my little sister in her youthful vigor; sits in her judgment seat wanting something.
drama she feels has never come to the fore
doesn't she know that there is nothing that hasn't been said
a million times or none?
she wants a change or her moment of justification
we were here first oh youngest sister I want to say
Ten years ahead of you in a time that was not your own
you search for an answer
a romantic version of an intervention
he drinks; she drinks
your all wrong
interwebbed;
so right you feel
child
your so right
we may not be so right; but we stay together
codependent?
your my girl
little toddler at my heels
I never pushed you away
I spoiled the kindness right out of you
so that you can sit in your judgement seat
saying the things that shouldn't be said
trying to break the family that has always held you so tight
what have we done to you for you to look at us with such disdain?
we only loved you
we held you too high and we spoke with each other
Barbara did this today
You can't believe what she said this day
we laughed at every word you said
we adored the heart right out of you
so that you ran to the first man (kid) that showered you with adoration
and drama; oh his drama
and you sit there with him
high on your little thrones
and he pushes you
further and further away
from us
we almost can't see you anymore
your deep deep in the distances; little specks of life
hes' pushed you further and further away from your family
the one thing that remains
hes' pushing you pulling you
and you go willingly
your knight in shining melodrama
always knows best
and you know as he tells you that
your family is messed up
he drinks; she drinks
yelling and loving
The chaos of family; let's not judge it
but we live it..
I wouldn't want my children anywhere else
where else would they learn how to love the unloveable?
to believe and to hope and to watch and dream?
What love is?
Not letting go when the going gets rough
not sitting on a throne in judgement
but to be out there and in it
Living it